It's Friday?

Sometimes being a WAHM (work at home mom) has it's disadvantages. I don't "go to work" as in leave the house every morning, do my 9-5, then return home.. No weekends off. No vacations. So sometimes it's hard keeping track of what the actual day is. It's Friday? Well hurray for the weekend, even though weekends don't really mean anything. Anyway.

Friday does mean that there is no boot camp for a few days. Well there IS boot camp tomorrow, HOT boot camp actually that I can't go to. Joel has to work at 4 (YES FOUR) am so he's going to miss it too. Maybe we'll go hiking when he gets home!

I don't remember if I posted about my blood work results... Everything came back normal, somethings are amazing actually.  My heart is in pristine condition, blood pressure is great, blood sugar is great. I had to really pin point why I wasn't losing weight as fast as I thought I should. I came to the conclusion that I just needed more cardio. A lot more of it. The kind of cardio that has me gasping for air, my side cramping, legs shaking. I know that now because after the brutal Gladiator race, which ended up being OVER 7k when we all thought it was 5k, I lost 4lbs almost immediately.  So I basically need to almost DIE to get the results I want. After my victory of completing the race and losing 4lbs, I got very sick. I had a cold before the race but then it got worse and hung out for about 3 weeks. I'm just about better.

I worked out all last week so for the most part, I'm healed. I still have a stupid clogged ear (my fault, squirted the shower hose at the race directly into my ear--twice) but that's mostly just annoying at this point. Now that I'm healed, I plan to go hiking every weekend. See, at the Gladiator race, we ran up a mountain trail. Switchbacks, up & down, slippery rocks... you get the picture. I was very surprised I survived and to be honest if I knew about that mountain I wouldn't have signed up. That mountain was the most challenging part of the race. It was long... brutal... seemed never ended. The hardest obstacle though was this wall.

It was an angry wall. I remember being at the bottom watching this tiny little thing struggling to get up and over. I knew she would eventually because Curtis was at the top barking at her that she "will not give up, GET.YOUR.BUTT.UP.HERE!!" She tried 3 times before finally making it, if that skinny girl could barely get over, there was NO WAY on earth I could haul my big booty over. Hayley made me go first, so I did. I was awesome doing it by myself for the first 2 steps, but once I had to actually go UP the wall I thought it was over. Then I felt a push from underneath me and it was Hayley. I reached up for Curtis' hand and started to move. I took one step then realized I was scared to death of falling and BEGGED, I mean BEGGED for Curtis to just let me go. I pleaded, tears in my eyes and voice to please just let me go, I can't do it. You think he listened? Um NO. Giving up is not part of the Rock Star code.. I don't even know why I wasted my breath, I knew he wouldn't let go. He shouted for help, two other people grabbed my arms and "hey you big guy" came over to help from below. I had a freakin' TEAM of people getting me over that wall! When I got up to the top the crowd below cheered. And then I cried. Joel even told me that he got choked up when I made it to the top... don't tell him I said that :)

Don't mind the funky picture quality, the settings got bumped and I had to recover this photo as much as possible. This is what I was left with, but it's proof I was on the wall. Curtis used this time for a photo op from the top view lol!

Anyway, where I was going with this was I need crazy mountain climbing cardio. I can't do it every day because for one I don't have time and I do boot camp 4-5 times a week. So the weekends it is. Now that I'm better I'm going back to North Mountain. If you remember the time I went hiking with Carmen a while back? It sucked, I hated it, I didn't even make it to the top. I waited for her while she went all the way and when she was done we went back down together. Well I'm going back to do the whole mountain. All the way to the top. Of course it's going to be hard but I already went up Estrella Mountain! I can certainly do North Mtn.

Since I've re-evaluated what's been going on, tweaking my food even more, I've been losing weight at about 2lbs a week. I guess that's okay. I read that 1-2lbs a week usually results in healthy fat loss and muscle gain and keeping the weight off instead of gaining it all back right away. So as long as I'm losing AT LEAST that much, I think I'm on the right track.

Tonight for dinner I'm making chicken patties with mixed veggies (mostly broccoli). It's my favorite go to meal right now and couldn't get any easier.

Contractions

Don't worry, I'm not having another baby.

Tonight at boot camp was one of the hardest workouts I've done to date. Seriously, I threw up in my mouth- twice. Just a little, but it happened. I was grunting like a warthog, and quivering like I was in Rhode Island in January, in a bikini. Cold was the least of my worries though. Curtis had us doing Isometric holds again, but not just any hold... Contracting every single muscle we could possibly contract WHILE holding. It's amazing what a little butt-clenching can do to you! I was shaking at the start and throughout each round. I'm actually very surprised and pleased that not ONE time did I have to stop or drop down to my mat :) Doesn't mean I didn't want to though.

I never thought I'd experience contractions when I wasn't in child labor or having a charlie horse. And definitely not intentionally. When I was in labor with my oldest Elika, my mom would say things like "relax" and "breathe" and "calllllm"... well duh.. But it's not that easy. You THINK you're relaxing, but until you focus on an exact body part to relax you're still tensing up and not realizing it. I thought it was so annoying listening to my mom coach my sister through her labor.. She had this soothing voice, I'm sure it was amazing for my sister, but as an onlooker, I couldn't wait for the whole event to be over just so I wouldn't have to hear the "breeeeaaatthee, reelaaaaaxxxxx, shhhhhhhhhhhh." So when it came my turn, I dreaded that voice HA HA! Little did I know when she told me to "relax," the way she actually said it was totally different to me. She went down the list of every muscle I was tensing and said to release it. "Relax your face" was more like "relax your eyebrows, your cheeks, your lips" Etc. Probably sounds bogus and weird, but having that focus brought to my attention really did amazing wonders.. I'm SO glad my mom was there!

Why does any of this matter, besides the part of contractions during labor and contractions at RSBC? What my mom was doing has the exact effect for the contrary. Curtis was saying "contract every muscle". I thought I was, until he stood right in front of me and went down the list. "Are you contracting your:

butt-cheeks?
shoulders?
tri-ceps?
bi-ceps?
calves?
back?
lats?"

check-check-oh wait, missed that one... missed that one too...check..hmmm. I THOUGHT I was flexing everything I possible could. WRONG. Once I was fully activated- wow. After that I was able to make a mental check list and make sure I was really flexing every single thing I could. I was totally spent by the end of the night. Totally.

Friday (tomorrow) I have a doctors appointment with my general practitioner to see if there are any underlying issues that I'm having that might hinder my weight-loss. Sadly I haven't lost much poundage since I started this whole thing 36 weeks ago :( It's depressing. I've lost about 10-15 pounds, and that fluctuates. It's so frustrating to work so hard, harder than I ever have in my life, and not have results. Yes I'm slimmer, I'm more toned, I'm stronger. At this size though, the number on the scale really DOES matter. Anyway, I still have my goal of 50 lbs by summer. I still have time. Hopefully I can get some answers and maybe I just need to increase my activity even more.

March 17th I'm doing the Gladiator Rock N Run 5K obstacle challenge. I'm a little freaked out, but I can do it. Seeing my fellow campers complete The Spartan Race was so motivating, I had to get a piece of that action. My husband is going to join in on the fun too! Hopefully someone will be there getting pictures as evidence that I did it!

So here is the big picture update, I see a little difference from the last one I took at week 21. Overall-- wow. My legs look pretty nice in those tights, not gunna lie.

Excuse the phone pic-- I had Joel snap it right before I left for camp!

Skinny Days

I haven't had many 'skinny days', but have far too many 'fat days'. Not just in literal size, but the feeling. Looking in the mirror and seeing myself bloated and.. just not being happy with  myself. A few times over the course of 9 weeks that I've been at boot camp, I've had a few "skinny days". Today was one of them. I woke up this morning and my pants felt a little loose, I knew they were far too big when I put my cell phone in my pocket and they just about fell down to my ankles! I went and weighed myself, stupid scale. I think I'm finally going to get a new one that will give a full reading. I know it's wrong because I'll step on, it'll give me one number, then I'll get off and repeat and it's completely different number, usually about 5 lb difference. I want to measure body fat % so I think I'll get a nifty one.

Anyway, the scale is not my friend, but my pants fell down, so something is happening for sure!

Then I looked in the mirror and said "huh.." turned to the side, turned to the front again.. asked my husband, "Does my stomach actually look smaller to you? or is it just me" Being the good man that he is, of COURSE he told me I looked smaller, he's smart. But no really, my stomach felt "flatter" not bloated at all, less flabby. (am I giving you a mental image yet? LOL!) My face looked a little skinnier too, and my butt.. well, I can't tell but my husband, yet again with a smart answer, said it's getting pretty toned..  okay, Honey.

So I felt good all day. I love having to tighten the drawstrings of stretchy pants. I always thought they were stupid for being put in them. Why would you tighten pants made to stretch? I had to tighten my workout pants too at camp! Curtis got in some new t-shirts and hoodies with the camp logo on them, I've been waiting for one to represent! so I'm glad I finally got one. It's a long sleeve, just in time too. I was able to fit in a size smaller than I thought, but still ended up going with the large size so I'm comfortable while working out and have a little wiggle room.

Cardio Monday was awesome. I got those pains in my side that I haven't gotten since week one. Curtis said when that happens I should scale it back a notch. So I take it that that means I was working my tale pretty hard :)

Finished up with an amazing dinner.. the kale salad I posted about last week. I had a huge helping and added in some roasted chicken and pears. Definitely a new favorite of mine. Now it's movie time with the hubs before bed.

Lovely day! Thank you to all my friends, family and supports. Your encouragement really means a lot to me and a few words really do go a long way.

Caricature

  

I was digging around in the garage and I found this behind some junk. It was still wrapped in plastic from when we bought it. I never even bothered to take it out of the bag. It's so disturbing! Joel and I got this at Sea World on our honeymoon after I BEGGED and begged for it. BEGGED. It was either this, or have our name painted in the shapes of the park animals. I wanted to name drawn more than this, but I think this stupid caricature was cheaper. Still it was like $30 or something. I remember as soon as he handed it over I hated it. 

I know they're suppose to be comical, but really? It's hideous. Next year when we return to Sea World for vacation I'm going to get a new one, I'll have a hawt bod by then so I'll have to do a side-by-side. ugh, what a waste of money, paper, and crayons.

Finally, a pic.

So today as I'm running out of the house I remember I needed to get a recent pic of me up PRONTO. I'm so overdue it's redonkulous. I thought, "I don't really have time for this right now, I'm already running late, but I my hair isn't a total wreck like normal, and I'm dressed... so perfect timing (sorta)". I had the hubs snap a quickie of me before running out to go hang out with my sister for the day.

I'm like 4 weeks behind so.... my bad.

In all, I've lost about 10 lbs.. Not really sure, because my scale is broken, stupid thing. I need a new one. I feel like I'm recovered enough to try Jillian's 30 day shred again... remember, I just had a baby via c-section, so jumping down to pushup position was not really doable the first time I tried. #OUCH!

Without further adieu, Here is my "before" and week 5

Houston, we have a problem.

My friend Elliptical Machine still has not made it's appearance. I got a call Monday asking me to reschedule delivery, so I do that and made another delivery appointment for Wednesday. A little hiccup in the plan, but it was just a day, we could work around this. Then Tuesday morning, I get another calling. The nice lady told me my package wasn't even arriving in their warehouse until Thursday, so that's when I can have it dropped off. THURSDAY. Two whole days after I had planned. I was suppose to be 2 days into my challenge.

This delay is making me itchy. I want my elliptical so bad it hurts. In the meantime, I figured I'd post a whole bunch of "Before" pictures. Not THE before picture, but some leading up to today. THE Before picture is the one I'll take right before I step on Elliptical Machine, and the one you'll see as a comparison to my weekly progress pictures.

So, no laughing.. at least I'm doing something about it.

The first is on my wedding day. I look at all these memories from the past and I feel like they're ruined by my size. I'll always be fat on my wedding day. I will never be that gorgeous, skinny, magazine page bride. Maybe in a few years we can renew our vows, have another ceremony just so I can be the stunning bride I've always wanted, and then I can look at THOSE pictures for the rest of our lives... meh.. Joel doesn't think so. He says he likes me just the way I was, after all he DID marry me that day DUH! Right? See that stray curl in my hair? Well I had lots more in the back, no one bothered to tell me that I had that one random curl in the front, with my short layers only, for the entire ceremony! ugh. (4/20/2007)



Another: excuse the poor quality.



This is me and the hubs on my 21st birthday. He's handsome, and has a great smile huh? I told you, he's ALWAYS happy! (5/12/2008)



I don't like to be in front of the camera too much by myself. So to accessorize, I usually grab someone cuter than me. It's usually my daughter Elika. These two are about a week apart. Elika is a month old (so this is 18 months ago) (12/09)





Here she is about 6-7 months old. (5-6/10)



I totally retouched my arm in photoshop so it didn't look so fat. Probably my chin too. Again, the cuteness 8 months old. (7/10)




This one I took after I got my hair done. It had been probably 8 months before that, that I had a chance to get my hairs did. I snapped a picture for my stylist so she could see the color in the sun light. (9/10)

 

The picture above is probably the last picture of me until I had Selah. It was taken in September of last year. Yea, that's how often I'm NOT in front of the camera. I get to use "I'm the photographer" as an excuse most of the times, but seriously... how sad is it for my kids to have almost no pictures of them with their own mother. And it's not fair that Joel gets to be in all the pictures just because I feel like a lard-o.

The ACTUAL last photos taken of me were when I was in the hospital after giving birth. Maybe I'll post one if I can find a decent enough one. I don't think I've even LOOKED at them! So people, here I am. THE Before picture that I'll be taking today or tomorrow will be revealed once I get my elliptical and I'm ready to start working out. You'll see the real me, to date. It's taking a lot of courage to do this whole thing, but I have you all to hold me accountable. Just do so nicely, I'm sort of a cry baby.